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If you want to stay cool this summer, don't be afraid to look corny

The dog days of summer are officially upon us, and with them a specific, heat-induced desperation. 
Scenario: a few days ago, I decided it would be fun to walk to the park. I wore a nice floral sundress festooned with flowers — lovely, right? Wrong. The dress was lined, and as the temperature crept above 90, those sticky sleeves and two (two!) layers of skirt fabric slowly adhered to my extremely sweaty flesh. And I was filled to the brim with hot, unmistakable regret.
Why didn’t I wear shorts and a tank? I thoughtWhy didn’t I wear a hat? And, most importantly:

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